letsdropin: (Tyler: Irreplacable)
Reid Garwin ([personal profile] letsdropin) wrote2011-02-14 12:23 am

In the Still of the Night

A/N: Written for Sex is Not the Enemy prompt. Follows up this and this.

Waking up in the middle of the night was nothing new for Reid. He was a light sleeper; it happened.

Waking up in the middle of the night, the scent of Tyler surrounding him, feeling the warmth of the other boy's body around him, one familiar arm under his hand and the other loose over his waist was nothing new for Reid, either. When neither of them was dating anyone, they often ended up curled up in the same bed. Mostly Reid himself curled into his baby boy, on account of being both shorter and more the burrowing type. He wasn't quite curled up into him, now, but he could still feel Tyler's breath ruffling his hair, and it felt good.

Then why was there a slightly unsettled feeling too?

It wasn't the soft after-sex feeling, both back and front. That wasn't new either. Especially not combined with the rest of it. The two of them had fun with sex, had been since they discovered it together (and apart, as far as Reid knew). Any combination, basically, but together was always on. Nothing new here, either.

No, it wasn't that.

And then he came to enough to realize it.

It was the absence of the feeling of something unsaid and difficult between them. For many weeks he'd gone to sleep and wakened with it in the pit of his stomach. And now it was gone. Which meant...

It was the tingle on his lip, the slightly tight feeling that only happened after a long, hard making out time, where kisses merged together and took each other's breath away, and they didn't kiss among themselves, well, Pogue and Caleb kissed, but he didn't kiss anybody, because kissing meant dating, and now his lips were warm and tight and tingling and wanting for more kisses, and all of that meant...

"God."

He bit his fist as soon as he realized that he'd spoken that out loud, but between the word and the way he tensed, Tyler stirred, and half-opened his eyes. A moment later, even if Reid made no other sound, the blue eyes (there was almost light enough for Reid to see them, but he knew the color by heart, anyway) blinked open more.

"Reid?" Whisper. And that one word made the blond blink quickly, and his throat tense, and his heart beat faster. It was like every time Tyler said his name. All their own, even if it happened a hundred times, every day, in whatever company. It was close to and yet different to the way Pogue's way of saying his name was private between them, and even the way Caleb's voice sometimes caressed the sounds. And even just that one word meant things. I'm awake, for example. And are you alright? And did something happen?

"Yeah." That's as much as he could manage to get out past his throat. But it seemed to be enough for Tyler's hand too leave its spot of warmth on his waist - but only to reach and turn on the nightlight. It was... good, in fact, after the first blink as the soft light flooded his vision. It returned color and textures to things, without being so bright as to drown them out again.

Where 'things' mostly constituted of Tyler's face. The curve of the cheekbone and the line of the jaw. The way his eyebrows were slanted a little in question and the way affection softened the deep blue eyes even as the web of sleep was clearing from them. So beautiful. His lips, their color a bit deeper, and a tiny bit more swollen, looking sort of like Reid's felt. The blond moved one hand to trace those lips with the pad of his finger, and Tyler made a quiet gasp before kissing it.

"We... really did it last night, didn't we."

The blue eyes warmed even more, corners crinkling slightly. "I'd say so, yeah."

No, Reid had been wrong, earlier. The heavy sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach was still there - it only had changed. Instead of things being undefined because he wouldn't define them, because if he did, that would mean they would have a name that he dreaded not because it was bad - far from it - but because it ended too soon. He gulped at that thought, and Tyler's eyebrows lowered slightly, a tiny crease forming between them. "Reid..."

"After I made..." And now he was awake, fully, and the fear returned. He didn't know how his expression changed, but he could see Tyler's frown deepen, and could feel his arm tightening its hold around his back. "I'm such an idiot."

"Hey, hey..." Reid's hands were already covering his face, because he realized again what he had done, and what might possibly - probably? He didn't know anymore - happen, and because he didn't want Tyler to watch his face twist and shit, it would just worry him. But then again, he could feel the warmth of the arm holding him tighter across his back, and the gentle caress of his baby boy's palm over his forehead and hair. "You're not an idiot, and it'll be okay, all right? It's..." A small pause, during which Reid was peeking out between his fingers and he could see that Tyler knew, and met his eyes unhesitatingly. "You know that if I thought anything of the kind, or if I thought anything bad would happen, I wouldn't be doing this, right?"

Somehow, that helped. Reid blinked his eyes open, lowering his hands until his arms were folded close in front of his chest. "You sure?"

"I'm positive, blondie. I'm not going anywhere, you're not going anywhere, and it's gonna be just fine." Tyler's hand cupped his cheek, thumb tracing the arch of it, and even that little gesture soothed the incipient jitters. "We're gonna be just fine, whatever happens, and for now, I have the best damn boyfriend I could have ever asked for."

That resulted in a full body shiver. But also, Reid's hands turned, and he laid them flat on Tyler's chest. "I... say that again."

"Boyfriend?"

"Yeah."

"My boyfriend. My boyfriend's name is Reid Garwin, he's awesome, he has amazing tats, and wicked brains that he usually puts to wicked uses, and a great sense of humor, and his hair is all askew because of bedhead, but that's fine, because he's still the most beautiful man I know."

"Ty..." Reid had to swallow. And the words got stuck somewhere about this, the blood rushing in his ears and his heartbeat, speeding up and almost skipping with those words.

"Yeah?" Simple, easy, warm. Somehow, their faces had ended up near enough that he could feel Tyler's breath on his skin.

"I... I do love you, you know. I mean, it's not because I messed up earlier that I said it, or because... I dunno. Anything else. I was... I knew it for a bit, but I don't want to mess it up, so I didn't say it, but I love you, like I never have loved anyone else before, and it's..." He flailed for words, but his friend... his boyfriend didn't let him flounder long.

"It's like there's nothing to compare to that special smile, or being held like this, or hearing your name spoken, or seeing ... well, me across the room as I walk in the door, or..."

"You know."

"Yeah, I most definitely do, blondie. Why do you think I'm here?"

"'cause..."

"Yeah."

It took Reid a moment. but then one hand uncurled from between them, and he reached it to hold his Ty, scooting closer. "And you're sure."

"My heart... o blondie... it beats for you."

"... oh shaddup."

Beat, and Tyler's eyebrows waggled. "Make me."

Reid blinked... and then leaned his face across the tiny distance which separated him from Tyler's. And kissed him. Soft, but long, and, well, it only took the slightest nudge to make it soft and deep, and his fingers were trailing up and down Ty's bare back while the younger man's fingers stroked his shoulder, under the covers. "How's this?" He panted a beat after their lips separated.

Tyler's long lashes took a moment to open up, framing the most, most beautiful blue eyes he had ever seen. "Acceptable." Tiny pause, and then the full lips stretched in a smile. "I want more."

"Well then, I'll have to do it right and proper this time..." And then he couldn't speak anymore, and this time it was a more proper, deep, making-out snog, and Reid wasn't sure which one of them whimpered when his hip jerked forward, grinding into Tyler's, and it didn't matter.

It was probably going to be hard to get going for school in the morning, Reid thought idly some time later as they were getting cleaned up, his ow hands shaking a little with the aftereffects even as he took his place again, cuddled into his-- his boyfriend.

"I love you, too, Reid." Whispered into his ear, earning a nuzzle into the side of Tyler's neck in return.

And in a moment, he managed to make his throat work enough to answer, "good."

His boyfriend.

His lover.

His beloved.

Tyler.

He drifted off with the name on his lips.

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