letsdropin | (no subject)

"Yeah?" Calm. Not quite bland or wide-eyed innocence, just. Calm.

"Wh--" He swallowed. All of a sudden kind of at a loss for words.

"Hey." Reaching to curl his fingers around his. "You okay?"

Eyes flicking down to their hands together. And very quietly, "what... does that mean?"

Blink. "It means... are you okay?" He doesn't yet realize Reid heard that. Which is actually really dense of him, but with all the rumors and teasing, somehow... it doesn't occur to him that Reid was listening.

"I... not this, this I... get." Faint liptwitch, yes, but no, he's not up to answering that at the moment. "Th-the. Boyfriend thing."

Oh. ".. Oh." Um. .. Huh.

"Well." Blink. Pause. Ponder. "Do you want it to mean something?"

Fingers tightening around Tyler's. A lot. A twitch-cling of its own, just because he's horrified he'll make a misstep now. Suddenly.

"N-n-oclue."

Just looks at him for a second, then lets go of his hand only to slide that arm around him. "'kay." Just... he doesn't know what to do or say right now, but this will help. He knows this part will help.

It does help. Leading to the probably foreseeable result in Reid crumpling a little and burrowing into him. Fingers clenching into his shirt.

"I don't... we don't..." breathe, Reid. "We don't go out with each other. Or... we didn't use to." Not that the comment makes much sense, outside his head.

Gently, quietly. Kissing his forehead, nuzzling through his hair. "Yeah, but you try explaining to that guy how we have mad fun sex and sleep together and pretty much spent our whole lives together but we date other people but... everything. Boyfriend was easier." Then, a little more softly, lips still almost pressed against his forehead. "Do you want to?"

"... oh." Okay, that makes sense. It really does.

Except, it doesn't unclench his stomach. Nor does it give him any idea how to answer the question.

"N-never thought... on it." And he hasn't, not even with the full awareness of Caleb and Pogue's date and everything. Deep breath. Softly, just a little more steadily. "You do." Not exactly a question.

Both arms close around him, holding him tight. "It'd be nice. We already almost are, and..." Small shrug. He isn't sure how to say, it'd just be nice to have that kind of ... solidity, maybe?

"But you've got your thing going. And I know you like it being different from our thing, which..." Small little sigh, because this is just awkward and he's not explaining it very well. Reid's dating record was, heh, questionable at best. And they were something else. Not dating, but something special and unique and them. "It's just our thing. And if you want it to be just our thing, that's okay too."

Slightly shaky breath, pressing his face against Tyler's chest, fully. Breathing in and hiding. And almost feeling Tyler's heart thumping against his skin. So fast. So hard.

Frightened? Excited?

Head rising just a bit, enough to peer up through his bangs onto Tyler's face. "How..., long have you been... how long has that been poking at your thoughts?" Because he doesn't think Tyler would actually consciously consider that, figure it out in his head and not... say something. Or maybe he's wrong?

And the worst part is that he doesn't know what he wants.

One hand rubbing up and down Reid's back, Tyler sighs. "Don't know." He really doesn't. He just never actually paid attention to it. "Maybe since your last breakup with what'shername?"

Small twitch at the mention of that, kind of unconscious. "Oh." His hold on Tyler's shirt shifts a little as he straightens up some, but doesn't let go. "Well. I'd almost say that at least this wasn't the result of my big mouth, except the break-up sort of was, so the comment's kind of ... void, isn't it."

Tyler almost even laughs. Definitely smiles. "No-o. Well, sort of. But I think this is just..." Small shrug, fingers trailing along his spine. "It is what it is. It's probably also a result of knowing each other real well, growing up together, and having lots of really hot sex."

Okay, the smile makes his shoulders relax a little. The stroking results in an almost-shiver, but not the kind that would make Reid look away; and he doesn't.

"Prob'ly." Beat. Lips twitch just a bit up. "Hot, and awkward, and fun, and funny, and, um. Yeah. And lots." Breath in. "But... That's not all this is."

There, now. That's the smile he likes to see. And... "No, it's not. But..." Small shrug. "Boyfriend... doesn't have to be it. I'm up for it if you are, or I can leave it if you aren't."

"I don't..." And then the words that come out aren't the ones he expects. "I don't want not to. I think." Overstatement, here. The thinking part, that is. "I mean... there used to be the whole thing where we... you know, just hang around, that's just one more way to do that, you know? In a way? Not going out with each other. I mean, not that I've..." Shrugs. "But now that's changed with Caleb and Pogue and dating and everything, you know? And not like I ever-- oouh." Eyes widening a little.

Breathed out. "Pogue. If-- ... um. we... Um. If we," meaning him and Tyler, "and he needs- I mean, I'd... I can behave, but if he needs-- it things aren't going---" yeah, no, words and thoughts, Reid totally lost them.

And by now Reid was just babbling and, what the hell. They were discussing it anyway. He knew Reid was squirrelly about it, but there were times when he didn't understand why. And there were times when it was hard, and right now was one of those times when he just wanted to take him and pull him close and cover his mouth with his.

So, well. He did.

One hand slid around to cup Reid's cheek and he pulled him in just a little bit closer and he kissed him, pressing his lips to his and not quite opening his mouth but definitely making it as deep and passionate as he could without forcing anything on him. Gentle. Soft. And with muscles knotting with the effort.

And eventually coming up for air so Reid could find his words again, maybe, or so Tyler could try and find his words again, if there were any.

Reid was by now completely freaking out in about four different directions at the same time, the latest addition being that if they did hook up, and Pogue needed... somebody, about the whole situation with Caleb, that would make things more complicated. And what he tried to say was that he would still go and be with Pogue. Just ... he could behave, it didn't have to get to cross boyfriend lines, but but but--

-- and then Tyler's lips were on his, hand warm on his cheek; both so soft and, again, tingling, and while by all rights it should have made things even worse, panicky and, they didn't kiss, that was for dating - instead, it calmed him down a notch. Or four.

He whimpered slightly in surprise at that. Relief. Confusion, but relief, and he didn't pull back, actually kissing back a little, eyes fluttering in hesitation between staying fixed on Tyler and closing in fully for the kiss.

"Ty..." But it wasn't a protest. Maybe a little bit question. Maybe a little bit just sighing out his name, almost a yes on its own. Then he turned his face a bit, into the warm palm on his cheek, without looking away.

... catch breath? What was that? With all the butterflies beating inside his chest, breathing was something else entirely.

"Mm?" Tyler was just... smiling. For so many reasons, chief of which was that Reid's body language was reciprocal rather than freezing up or freaking out. Whatever they wound up deciding, he hadn't freaked out his friend, and that was good.

"It's okay. It's Pogue, I know that." And it was. If it was Pogue, if it was Caleb. If it was one of them, that didn't matter so much. Somehow. He didn't know if he could explain it, but it was just... it was them. And that was different.

Ad the rest... if Reid brought up other things, he'd try to answer them, at least. He could do that.

But it felt like something had loosened up between them, and that was a relief to him, too.

"...oh." But that simple statement was enough to settle him a bit. Or maybe it was the smile and that tone of voice, which was... very-Okay-Tyler. Not that his mind wasn't spinning anymore (it was, even faster), but the jitters calmed away, at least the worst of them.

He stood for a few moment, just caught a bit like that, not knowing what to do. Then sighed softly. "Good. Yeah, it's..." It was Pogue, and it was them. He closed his eyes, and leaned a little, forehead against the younger boy's.

And then it kind of struck him. That Tyler had kissed him. And they were talking about being boyfriends, and he had kind of kissed back, and "Ty... what are we doing?"

Except it wasn't a panicky question. It was an I-have-no-idea-what-I'm-doing question. Which was, granted, an extreme rarity for Reid and thus, well, something. But at least not accompanied by curling in on himself or pushing away or... anything.

He shifted his hold on Reid a bit, pulling him close so that he was holding him, cradling him. Fingers playing a little through his hair over the back of his neck. "I think..." And he said it slowly, because slower was better right now, right? Slower gave them time to assimilate.

"I think we're deciding... whether or not we're dating?"

Yes, it was a question. Asked with a smile, and mostly for clarification, but it was still a question. They were both pretty worked up, it might be easier to talk about this kind of thing later.

Maybe not. Maybe they were just confirming what they'd been slowly heading towards all along. Either was pretty valid. But it was still the best way he could figure out to say it... Given that Reid hadn't given a solid yes or no to the earlier questions.

Reid snuggled into him; he didn't even think about it. It was good and it was safe, and his fingers even unclutched from the back of his shirt and rested more like a hug against the broad shoulders.

"Yeah, that... sounds about... right, doesn't it." And now he was sounding calmer. A little. Sorting in his mind, somewhat. About... why he hadn't considered it before.

"It's... I'd never thought about it, you know? Me and Pogue... it's not like that. I mean, he's hot and everything, but it's..." Small shrug. "And, you know, the thought of me and Caleb dating - you can see how that doesn't work out." Deep breath. "And with... you know, that first time I walked in on you in the shower. You were... I... you know, there were always other people, so I never thought..." Deep breath, and snuggling in a moment or two longer.

Then he looked up again."But things are... obviously changed, since then, right? So... you think we might work out?"

"Don't see why not." There was a Tyler grin, a typical happy Tyler grin. Reid sounded like he was starting to calm down, and that was really good.

He did shrug a little, at the reason. "I mean, yeah, the timing never really was... But... I guess the timing's okay, now?" Because they're talking about it. And they're doing something about it. Which sounded like it meant, actually hooking up this time. In the dating way, not just the sleeping with each other way.

"And the rest of it... we really could work it out. Hell, we stand a better chance than a lot of people, we know each other better than we know almost anyone else."

So, in other words, that was a yes from Tyler. Assuming the kiss hadn't been 'yes' enough. Or maybe clear enough.

And it was really that simple. Tyler only had to smile like this, and it all did seem possible and... why-not, and Reid just... wanted to stick around and make that smile happen. Again, and again, and again.

"I... you..." He gulped. It really was making his mind stutter and thud into a halt. That it was a yes from Tyler. That somebody wanted him that way, that was always a thrill; that Tyler did--

Do I?

And that was the question, wasn't it? Not that he hadn't been asked it... what, four times already. So, he should stop wiggling around it, right?

He closed his eyes, for a moment, then shifted a little. Just enough to reach one hand up so he could run fingers all over the familiar face. Lightly. Touching forehead, brows, temples, cheeks, down along the line of his chin. Up the other cheek, down the line of his nose. Resting the gloved palm against his cheek, lightly.

Familiar. Beautiful.

"This should be... I should be... better..." Another gulp, and this one had almost as much air with it as to make him cough, but not quite. Gulping for air. No... not air. This.

because this moment, with the confusion and the head-spinning, was...

Heady.

And he wanted more.

"Yes." It was barely more than a whisper. It was barely a request, hell, he was actually really bad at asking things of people, wasn't he? And even if he had Tyler's answer already, it still suddenly felt like he was asking. For the chance, for this, for everything. The world suddenly expanding and collapsing at the same time. These two warm arms around him. The soft touch on his cheek, suddenly seeming to be what was holding the whirlwind at bay and keeping it from swallowing him.

"Yes." He tried for a steadier voice, although the success was dubious. "I ... want."

And Tyler's heart clenched tight in his chest when Reid said that, eyes going wide. Because as much as he'd hoped, or maybe just imagined that it could happen, a part of him was also very aware that Reid hadn't made any moves towards that since they'd started sleeping together.

And that was fine, that had always been fine, as long as Reid was happy he was happy, for the most part. Where this kind of thing was concerned.

But now that they'd started talking about that he was sort of feeling the hope rise, the idea that they really could be together, that way. And it wasn't until Reid said yes that Tyler had some idea of how much he'd wanted him to.

"Okay..." Tyler breathed, eyes wide and almost giddy. He nodded, took a breath, tried to remember everything they'd said about what that meant. Which wasn't much, really. Just... formalizing things. "Okay."

And then he kissed him. Because he loved him.

Reid had known. It was why he didn't just dismiss the whole thing out of hand; he knew that the hope was there. And... something. The image of the what those blue eyes would have looked if he'd just... something.

It wasn't why he said yes.

But even if he didn't think it consciously, it was there, and it made him think.

On the other hand,seeing the glow, this glow ... wow. Reid's own eyes widened at how amazing that looked.

And his finger curled a little, tips trailing in Tyler's hair, and he kissed back. Softly, but he opened his lips without hesitation when the warm mouth pressed against his.

And then it was his turn to murmur "okay," without pulling away.

Okay. Two of the most beautiful syllables in the English language.

Now that he'd started kissing him he almost couldn't get enough. It was crazy. It was wonderful and crazy and right now he was almost holding his breath to stay still and just kiss him. And hold him, and be held and kissed in return.

Of course, he did have to breathe eventually, but it was really really nice while it lasted.

And when they pulled apart to breathe he trailed his fingers through Reid's hair, brushing through the blond strands at the back of his neck.

"You are one amazing guy, you know that?" he almost whispered. Still grinning.

Still glowing.

They could go back to kissing. After. ... actually, they would go back to kissing. Right?

That said, the words made his eyes widen, then his brows twitched. "... you sure you're talking about the same person that's standing right here? I mean... you know. The... whole messing things up thing going, I've got it?"

Yes, he was back to babbling. And he didn't know how to stop, he couldn't catch up to his thoughts at all... except that this felt nice. Felt good.

And the more he tasted of it, the more and more he wanted. All of a sudden.

Tyler grinned. "Yeah, I'm sure. I mean, you mess things up, but you fix them too." His expression softened, because it was a flippant answer to a serious question, even if he didn't regret it.

His fingers combed through Reid's hair, slowly, front to back. "You weren't the only one messing things up in those relationships. You made mistakes, yeah, I've seen you make a whole shitload of mistakes. And I know you fix them, if you can. You make it right."

And that was sort of an explanation. And sort of a reassurance, and he wasn't sure how else to explain it so he leaned in and kissed his forehead. And then kissed his mouth, because he could.

God, that was wonderful.

"You're even more amazing because you do have the balls to go back and make things right when you mess things up," he breathed. There, that was what he'd meant to say. "And that's pretty fucking special."

"...oh." Reid didn't really mind flippant answers. He gave enough of them, he shouldn't object - and he didn't. He got them.

And right now his mind was still a little more on the mess-up earlier with Lucy and Thomas. More Thomas. Which he had known was going to be tacky, and was worrying about her, a little, somewhere under the whole whirlwind of ohgod this-and-here.

Which is why the last bit had an effect. He stilled a little, eyes on Tyler's face, their corners crinkling a bit with the last sentence. "Mmm... and my fucking is special?" He teased, in a sort of an effort to tug them back on familiar ground.

Except he also leaned to kiss in turn, just to see what that would do, because he was also curious, and he did like kissing, and there was something about the way Tyler leaned into those kisses, in the way his lips moved against his, in the ... everything. That was tugging at his attention. Cautious approach? ... something.

So this time, Reid was the one who kissed him. Not that he had that far to go, Tyler's breath was warm and sweet on his lips and all. But...

... and then he squinted. "You... really like this." Again, not exactly a question, though he wouldn't put it down as certainty in his mind without confirmation.

Tyler did laugh some at that comment. Of course it was, and his kisses were also special. Right now even more special because it was so new. New enough to make him gasp a little into the kiss.

But then Reid asked, and. "Yeah. I really do." Soft-voice, everything felt soft and fuzzy around the edges. Melting with all the kisses and revelations.

And he did like it. All of it. Hell, he liked spending time with Reid regardless, even with all the complaining about the blond getting him into trouble. It was still time spent with Reid, and that made it good.

"You, too?" Just... um. Just to make sure. Now that he said it it sounded kind of silly. But maybe he, too, wanted a little confirmation. Just to be reassured.

Or maybe they could just drag the conversation into one of those gushing and teasing each other conversations, because that was good too.

"'m trying to wrap my mind about it..." he started, eyes glittering a little.

He didn't find the question silly; then again, his standards for that kind of thing were ... different.

"But the whole thing where my lips are tingling and I want more is a good sign, I think. I don't think my lips have been tingling with anyone else, actually. And I'd like to find out just exactly how much I do like it, you know? If you're up to experimenting that way, of course. I mean..."

Babbling, and yet not quite. He meant every single word, there.

Yeah, no. Babbling or not, and Tyler knew he meant it, but Reid's lips were going to stop moving now.

It was a good sign. He wanted more, too. He wanted as much as he could get, and right now it seemed like he couldn't get enough. Long, deep, maybe a little clumsy or sloppy but, kisses. Reid kisses. On the mouth.

It was a little amazing to him that they hadn't done this before, but at the same time it made it really, really damn special. And perfect. Just perfect.

And for a while, there was very little beside kisses. Well, maybe touches, careful fingers and small caresses on each other's faces, Reid's other hand settling on Tyler's shoulder, feeling his hand settle on the small of has back. Briefly settle, at least.

But mostly, there were kisses.

Reid knew exactly why they hadn't done this before. He knew he had been the one pulling away from it in the past, making faces, even freezing a little, sometimes. Not quite every of the few times it had been attempted, but most. Enough for Tyler to know not to do it, to deflect the desire into other things.

No longer.

Long and deep, and then soft little kisses that didn't quite match each other, but good Christ, Tyler's lips were sweet and soft and warm and his mouth was hot, and he was forgetting the whole breathing thing for a while, at least it felt so, because his head was spinning, and spinning...

"Good start," he gasped, eventually, and then kissed again, and then gasped more, "of the whole experimentation schmick."

Yeah, his mouth was busy, he was almost shutting up.

Kisses were good. Kisses and touches and all the myriad little things he'd wanted to do now and again over the years but as he'd learned what Reid shied away from, he never had. And now he could.

And it was amazing. It was heady, it was dizzying, it was lifting him up and floating him away to a world that was just him and Reid, and nothing else.

It was perfect. It was absolutely perfect.

The longer kisses pulled at places lower in his body, the softer kisses made his chest clench. The juxtaposition between the two was enough to make him giddy.

"Think so...?" he murmured, trying to capture his lips again. "Works better with more kissing."

But he was grinning, almost laughing even with the kisses.

Oh, all of this. No, Reid hadn't quite yet figured out why it was so thoroughly ... something. Not quite overwhelming, but... all-encompassing. Yeah, that one. Everything. It was just...

"Thinking," he gasped out, grinning, "doesn't work better with more kissing. That said..." More kissing, oh so very much more kissing. "For some reason, I really, really want to just do that. Lots and lots of it."

It wasn't like he had been longing for it for a while or anything, not at all; but now that they had started, he didn't want to stop. The tingle that had been on his lips the other morning at the brief peck was spreading all over him, and he just wanted more, and more.

"'s fantastic. You're fantastic."

"Then don't think," Tyler chuckled, between kisses. "We can do lots of this. Fantastic..." Mm, more kisses. "Doesn't even begin to cover it."

And, yeah. More kisses, but also...

... he wasn't sure what gave him the idea, or if it was just something they did, or all the things they'd done. But pretty soon his hands were crawling under Reid's shirt, moving to take it off so there could be more kissing with his hands all over the warmth of Reid's body.

And he was pretty sure his blondie would like it, too.

"Do I ever?" Impish grin between kisses. And caught in the look in those blue eyes for a moment, before more kisses caught him in another way.

... and then. Reid actually gasped and shivered, with the feel of Tyler's hands on his body. God, in a way, he had practically forgotten the... rest of the things they could ... do. For a few moments, but still, too caught up in the unexpected and the possible and meanings and blue eyes just a tad darker than his, and a pair of incredibly soft lips and the feel they gave him, and...

"... oh, no you don't." Smirk. Deep kiss, before grappling for Tyler's own shirt, sloppily taking it off in turn, and kissing again, and then,

naturally,

tickling.

Tyler had and hadn't, in a way. Probably because he'd been thinking of this even subconsciously for a while. And he still wanted more, more touches, more skin. More kisses, and... well, Reid taking off his shirt was always welcome, but...

"Reid!"

It wasn't his exasperated Reid!, not with the laughing. Maybe startled, and yelping. He wriggled and squirmed under Reid's hand, trying to get to a vantage point where tickling wasn't an option.

Eventually he just gave up and tickled back.

Yes, Reid was, for once in a very rare while, behind with things. He hadn't even realized how much, yet, too caught up in the now to try catching up and figuring things out.

"Yes, Ty?" Giggling and wiggling, very much, and tickling back, and really, actually maneuvering them haphazardly (Tyler was good at knowing where and how to tickle him, too!) towards the bed. Where he'd try to flop down on, on top of Tyler and pinning his arms under him...

... but that didn't work out, exactly.

They still found themselves pressed close and face against face with relatively minimum jostling into each other, and that was its own kind of win, right?

"You're a brat." Tyler laughed, and meant to say something more except, mm, bed. And, mm. Pressed up against Reid and that needed more kissing, so he did. And grabbed Reid's wrists, lightly, then slid his hands up to palm-to-palm, lacing fingers.

And more kissing. Now that they at least temporariyl couldn't tickle.

"Anytime for you, baby boy." Smirk, big wide smirk at that. And then eyelashes fluttering at what Tyler did with their hands, fingers lacing and holding back, though.

A heartbeat's pause, and then he kissed back, and it was different yet again. Softer and longer, and eyes just a little wide again, between kisses.

Soft kisses, long and not as deep as before, but no less heartfelt. This was the kind of kiss that was meaning something, conveying something that probably wasn't for right now. Too much.

But still, he felt it, so he tried to let him know it. With kisses.

Reid got it. Not in words or concepts in his mind, no. But it was his turn to feel his belly clench, tight, and his thumb to brush along the back of Tyler's hand, the other hand slipping free only to slip-slide along the --

-- along his boyfriend's back. Resting on his neck, fingertips lightly into his hair. And more kissing.

And because Reid was Reid, between kisses he blinked at him, and smirked. "Let me know if I'm going too fast or anything, right?"